I’ve never liked those birthday posts that were thinly veiled brag letters so I decided to write my birthday post as a Mad Lib template that can be used for all future boasting.

Dear friends,

So much has happened over the last year, you wouldn’t believe that I   am trying to make it sound that I did more than eat, sleep and work (accomplishment) .

But let’s start at the beginning. With family. My  two (number) children are amazing.  I love them so much because  I’m hoping their successes negate my failures (reason you love them).  They’ve grown so much over the last year.

My 1st (1st/2nd/etc)  daughter (son/daughter) has learned to turn on the tv & DVD player by herself (accomplishment.)

My  2nd (1st/2nd/etc)  daughter (son/daughter) has learned to not pee her pants for the most part (accomplishment.)

My (1st/2nd/etc) (son/daughter) has learned to (accomplishment.)

My (1st/2nd/etc) (son/daughter) has learned to (accomplishment.)

My wife (wife/husband/SO/booty call) has  put up with me for another year (accomplishment) which is awesome and I completely support her every step of the way.

As for myself, I’ll be brief and list my top for highlights from the last year:

1.   Got a raise.
2.  Went on vacation.
3.  Bought something really expensive .
4.  Tried to make the above sound cooler than when other people do it .

However, most of all I want to be thankful for how wonderful and how perfect and what absolute dream come true my life has been. I’m most thankful that I didn’t get downsized in current economy (reason).

I hope this post doesn’t come across as bragging. I just wanted to catch everyone up on what I’ve been doing for the last year. I hope your lives have been just as wonderful and I’m wishing you all the very best.

Sincerely,

Corin

P.S. – I’m so doing one of these Mad Libs for those Christmas letters that I get every year.

Category: My friends don't care that I'm uncool | 2 - Leave a comment

My friend Clarice dresses in the skimpiest outfits when she goes dancing. She’s looks incredibly hot and so I’ve told her equally handsome, down-to-earth, one of the coolest guys in the world husband who dresses like he stepped out of a J Crew catalog.

Yes, I know the photos are a completely gratuitous attempt to spice up my blog with the sexy girl showing skin cliché. But hey, who am I to reinvent the wheel? All blogs need a little sex appeal and my fat ass certainly isn’t going to provide that.

(Side note: I’m eating Ben & Jerry’s ice cream while I’m writing this.)

Last night, a group of us celebrated her 23rd birthday. Clarice has had many 23rd birthday over the years and that’s just the way she likes it.

I met her dancing a few years ago through friends because the Denver alternative crowd is pretty small and eventually you meet everyone. I’m glad I did. She’s the only club person I know who knows how to lindy hop, and we have a blast swing dancing to the Cure’s Love Cats.

I’ve never heard her say a bad word about anyone..ever. She’s unassuming, bubbly, charming, funny, generous and modest and that’s why her friends universally adore her. She’s is nicest person that I know.

After dancing, she and her hubby hosted a movie night. On her birthday at 2am, she’s serving food, making sure everyone has drinks, showing people how to work the recliners and getting blankets and pillows so the people on the floor would be comfortable. All the while, everyone’s telling her to sit down and relax because we had already raided her fridge for frozen pizza and drinks as soon as we arrived. That’s what you get when you invite drunk people to your house in early hours.

Most of all, I admire her. She isn’t the type of person who defines herself by playing hostess to a bunch of inebriated guests in her family room which is roughly the size of my house, or being doting wife to a wonderful and successful husband.

She’s the type of person who defines herself by working 30 hour shifts in the Intensive Care Unit as a resident physician of one of the best hospitals in the city.

Happy birthday, Clarice! I hope your thirty-f twenty-third year will be spectacular.

Category: My friends don't care that I'm uncool | 2 - Leave a comment